Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: age, car, check, companion, couple, day, era, funds, funny, gift, highway, history, humor, husband, jokes, journey, laughter, license, man, Mathematics, money, partner, path, period, present, princess, road, short, smiles, sports, spouse, surprise, time, token, tour, tourist, traffic, travel, trip, truck, Valentine's Day, weight, wife, woman
A couple had been looking at new cars for months. He wanted a simple truck and she wanted a fast little sports car so she could zoom through traffic and look like a princess.
He would have settled for almost any old truck, but everything she wanted was way out of price range.
“Look!” she said. “I want something that goes from 0 to 220 in 5 seconds or less. Read More
Jul 30 2008
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: campus, check, college, visitor, writer, writing
A visitor to a certain college paused to admire the new Hemingway Hall that had been built on campus.
“It’s a pleasure to see a building named for Ernest Hemingway,” he said.
“Actually,” said his guide, “it’s named for Joshua Hemingway. No relation.”
The visitor was astonished. “Was Joshua Hemingway a writer, also?” Read More
Jul 30 2008
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: couple, funny, husband, jokes, man, marriage, money, restaurant, short, waiter, waitress, wife, woman
My husband retired, and for the first time in over 40 years I had to think about preparing midday meals.
Tired of it after several months, I said, “I married you for better or worse, but not for lunch.”
“Fair enough. From now on I’ll make my own,” he replied.
A few weeks later he had to go downtown on business and invited me to join him afterwards.
“We could have lunch at that Chinese place we both like,” he suggested. Read More
Jul 30 2008
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: computer, funny, jokes, man, printer, short, technician, woman
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard’s DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn’t solve. She
could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me
because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow.
For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink
Read More
Jul 30 2008
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: child, courage, cowboy, designer, fashion, funny, grace, hilarious, humor, jokes, laughter, leather, mother, parent, school, smiles, students, style, teacher, woman
A Texas school teacher who was helping one of her kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots. He asked her for help and she could see why. Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn’t want to go on. By the time they got the second boot on, she had worked up a sweat. She almost cried when the little boy said, “Teacher, they’re on the wrong feet.” She looked and sure enough, they were.
It wasn’t any easier pulling the boots off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to get the boots back on, this time, on the right feet. He then announced, “These aren’t my boots.”
Read More
Jul 30 2008
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: attorney, boss, college, company, court, employee, employer, funds, funny, graduation, hilarious, humor, job, jokes, judge, laughter, law, lawyer, man, manager, money, New York, office, phone, school, smiles, task, team, time, work
Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to come back to his hometown after graduation because he could be a big man in this tiny town.
He really wanted to impress everyone, so he opened his new law office, but business was very slow at first. One day, he saw a man coming up the sidewalk to his office. He decided to make a big impression on this new client when he arrived. As the man came to the door, Joe picked up the phone. He motioned the man in, all the while saying, “No! Absolutely not! You tell those clowns in New York that I won’t settle this case for less than $1 million. Yes. The appeals court has agreed to hear that case next week. I’ll be handling the primary argument, and the other members of my team will provide support. Okay. Tell the DA that I’ll meet with him next week to discuss the details.”
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Jul 30 2008