Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Two friends chatting one day
Jim: “Harry you know that girls with brown eyes should not be trusted?”
Harry: “Not sure . Why?”
Jim: “Dont know but they just cant be trusted.”
Harry became worried since he was not sure of the color of his wife’s eyes.
Soon after lunch he dashed home and ran straight to his bedroom where he found his pretty sweet wife naked and sleeping.
Quickly he lifted her eyelash and exclaimed “Oh God, Brown!” From under the bed came the startled voice of Lashley Browne. “How in God’s name you knew I was here man. I gotta give it to you , you are a genius. Excuse me I was just leaving. She is real good!”
Aug 09 2008
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
A third grade teacher was getting to know her pupils
on the first day of school. She turned to one little girl
and asked, “What does your Daddy do?”
The girl replied, “Whatever my Mommy tells him to do.”
Aug 09 2008
Posted: under Dumb Blonde Jokes.
Tags: blonde, funny, jokes
Promises, promises.
Bubbles and Barbie, two blonde sisters had promised their Uncle, who
had been a seafaring gentleman all his life, to bury him at sea when
he died.
Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the two blondes kept
their promise. They set off from Clearwater Beach with their uncle all
stitched up in a burial bag and loaded onto their rowboat.
After a while Bubbles says, ‘Do you think we’re out far enough,
Barbie?’ Barbie slipped over the side and finding the water only knee
Deep said, “nope, not yet Bubbles”. So they row a little farther….
Again Bubbles asks Barbie, ‘Do you think we’re out far enough now?
Once again Barbie slips over the side and almost immediately says, “No,
this will never do, the water is only up to my chest. ”
So on they row and row and row, and finally Barbie slips over the side
Read More
Aug 09 2008
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
A young man comes home and says “Dad, I just got my driver’s license and so would like to use the family car.”
Father replies, :”O.K, son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we’ll see.”
Well, several months passed and the young man comes into the house with his report card in his hand. “Dad, I got great marks on my report card. I’ve been keeping my room neat and the yard is always clean. How about letting me use the car?”
Father replies, “That’s all true, but son you didn’t cut your hair.”
Son says, “But, dad, Jesus too had long hair.”
Father replies, “Yes, son, you’re perfectly right. And he walked everywhere he went.”
Aug 09 2008
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Upset over a newlywed squabble with my husband, I went to my mother to complain.
Trying to console me, my dad said that men are not all like this all the time.
“Nonsense,” I said. “Men are good for only one thing!”
“Yes,” my mother interjected, “but how often do you have to parallel park?”
Aug 09 2008
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
David, a big city CPA, moves to the country and decides he’s going to take up farming.
He heads to the local co-op and tells the man, “Give me 100 baby chickens.”
The co-op man complies.
A week later David returns and says, “Give me 200 baby chickens.”
The co-op man complies.
Again, a week later David returns. This time he says, “Give me 500 baby chickens.”
“Wow!” the co-op man replies, “You must really be doing well!”
“Naw, not really.” said David with a sigh, “My problem may be that I’m just new to farming. They keep dying off on me.
I think I may be planting them too deep or too far apart!”
Aug 09 2008