Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "LOVE is LOVELY", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: abroad, accident, age, aid, aim, air, air force, amazement, America, army, aroma, attention, belief, blessings, blood, bridge, care, caring, cheer, club, cologne, commitment, community, companion, contribution, cosmetic, country, couple, cure, designer, destination, doctor, donation, duty, effort, efforts, entertainment, era, exam, example, faith, family, fashion, fish, fishing, flag, force, foreign, fragrance, friends, friendship, fun, funny, funtime, gift, girl, goal, God, granny, gratitude, group, gynecologist, healing, health, highway, hilarious, history, humor, husband, hygiene, imagination, inspiration, job, jokes, journey, labor, land, laughter, letter, life, lifestyle, lifetime, love, mail, man, marine, marines, medical, medicine, military, mission, moment, morale, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, nation, navy, need, needs, neighbor, odor, others, partner, patriotic, patriotism, perfume, period, personnel, physician, pledge, present, quiz, relaxation, rest, road, role model, Savior, scent, service, sharing, sleep, smell, smiles, soldier, soldiers, son, specialist, spirit, spouse, style, success, surgeon, surprise, task, test, thankfulness, time, token, tour, traffic, travel, trip, troops, truck, vehicle, war, wife, wind, woman, work
.
Tampons
========
.
My son told me how wonderful the care packages we had sent them
from the ladies auxiliary were and wanted me to tell everyone
thank you.
.
He said that one guy we’ll call Marine X, got a female care
package and everyone was giving him a hard time. My son said,
‘Marine X got some really nice smelling lotion and everyone
really likes it, so every time he goes to sleep they steal it
from him.’ I told my son I was really sorry about the mistake,
and if he wanted I would send Marine X another package. He told
me not to worry about Marine X because every time I send
something to him, he shares it with Marine X.
.
He said when my husband and I sent the last care package, Marine
X came over to his cot picked up the box, started fishing
through it, and said, ‘What’d we get this time?’
.
But my son said they had the most fun with Marine X’s package.
He said he wasn’t sure who it was supposed to go to, but the
panties were size 20, and he said one of the guys got on top of
the Humvee and jumped off with the panties over his head and
yelled, ‘Look at me, I’m an Airborne Ranger!!!!’
.
One of the guys attached the panties to an antenna and it blew
in the wind like a windsock. He said it entertained them for
quite awhile. Then of course…….they had those tampons. When
he brought this up, my imagination just went running, but he
continued.
.
My son said they had to go on a mission and Marine X wanted the
Chap-Stick and lotion for the trip. He grabbed a bunch of the
items from his care package and got in the Humvee. As luck would
have it he grabbed the tampons too, and my son said everyone was
teasing him about ‘not forgetting his feminine hygiene
products.’
.
He said things went well for a while, then the convoy was
ambushed and a Marine was shot. He said the wound was pretty
clean, but it was deep. He said they were administering first
aid but couldn’t get the bleeding to slow down, and someone
said, ‘Hey! Use Marine X’s tampons!’ My son said they put the
tampon in the wound. At this point my son profoundly told Me,
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Mar 09 2012
Posted: under "A Scripture A Day Keeps The Devil Away", "A Slice Of Life", "LOVE is LOVELY".
Tags: belief, blessings, bliss, blood, body, Christ, cross, day, earth, eyes, faith, flowers, focus, friends, friendship, gift, global, globe, God, happiness, heart, Jesus, joy, King, lamb, land, life, lifestyle, lifetime, Lord, love, man, message, others, present, prize, rose, roses, salvation, Savior, scripture, sheep, shepherd, son, soul, spirit, sugar, surprise, today, token, treats, universe, Valentine's Day, wishes, woman, world
.
.
For God so loved the world,
that He gave His only begotten Son,
that whosoever believeth in Him
should not perish,
but have everlasting life.
John 3:16
* * * *
The first Valentine message
is still the best one ever sent.
* * * *
God bless you Today and Always ….
.
.
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Feb 14 2012
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "LOVE is LOVELY", "Life is precious handle with PRAYER!", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: age, aid, aim, air, anxiety, baby, bank, belief, blessings, bliss, care, career, caring, charity, check, child, college, comfort, community, companion, compassion, contribution, couple, dad, depression, difference, donation, duty, earth, era, eyes, faith, family, father, father-in-law, finger, fingers, friends, friendship, funds, gas, gift, global, globe, goal, God, granny, gratitude, hand, hands, happiness, heart, history, home, House, hug, hugs, husband, idea, ideas, inspiration, job, joy, labor, land, language, life, lifestyle, lifetime, listening, love, man, marriage, memory, moment, money, mood, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, need, needs, neighbor, neighborhood, others, parents, partner, period, power, prayer, pride, reason, rivers, school, sharing, smiles, sound, spouse, stream, stress, surprise, task, thankfulness, thought, time, token, trust, truth, universe, voice, water, wealth, wife, wind, woman, words, work, world
.
Whirlwind
==========
.
I have no idea why I am sitting here about to tell the world
about my situation, but maybe it will help someone.
.
A little over a year ago I found myself back home, working two
jobs, single, feeling alone and pregnant.
.
Now the reason for me being back home was so that I could save
some money so that I might be able to buy my first home. I was
working two jobs so that I could pay my current bills off.
.
I also wanted to start a new career. I was a nail tech and an
intake person. I was 28 years old, a single woman longing to be
married but finding myself alone and pregnant which I thought
would never happen.
.
My mother and step-father gave me the option to move in for one
year so that I could save a little faster. Well my year had
come to a close and it was time to go, if you know what I mean.
.
One day I felt like I was sitting in a chair in the middle of
the room and looking above only to see the whirlwind of my
problems going around me. I was like “wow if I get pulled up
into this mess I’d just keel over.” Well you know what happened
next. Our words do have power because all of a sudden it seems
as though I became trapped in this whirlwind.
.
I then began to give up until I remembered that God said that we
should cast all of our worries unto Him, so I began to pray a
prayer with all my heart. With faith I believed that He would
fix all of this, but I didn’t quite know how.
.
The next day while working at the nail shop around 5 p.m.,
I began to tell a client of mine about my situation. After
crying all over myself at the end of her appointment, she gave
me a big hug and said that I was strong and everything would
work itself out. Now that was the last thing that I wanted to
hear. I was in trouble and needed major help.
.
So by the end of my shift around 10 p.m. that client of mine who
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Jan 23 2012
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "DID YOU KNOW", Inspirationals.
Tags: Africa, African-American, age, aim, America, American, anniversary, arm, arms, army, beauty, black, blacks, bliss, body, bracelet, Brazil, Britain, British, campaign, caring, celebrity, ceremony, challenge, check, children, Chinese, college, community, companion, computer, couple, culture, designer, diamonds, diet, duty, earrings, earth, effort, election, England, era, Europe, example, exercise, family, fashion, finger, fingers, first lady, flag, food, funds, game, garden, global, globe, goal, gold, government, hair, hairdo, hairstyle, hand, hands, happiness, health, home, honor, House, hug, hugs, husband, icon, inspiration, internet, interview, jewelry, job, joy, kisses, labor, language, leader, life, London, love, magazine, man, Mathematics, military, money, moral, morning, mother, nation, navy, necklace, neighborhood, New York, online, partner, performance, period, photos, politics, power, president, project, recipe, ring, role model, school, service, sharing, show, smiles, soldier, soldiers, South Africa, sport, spouse, style, support, task, television, time, tour, universe, updo, values, veggie, veggies, veteran, veterans, voter, White House, wife, woman, words, work, world, youth
***
As the First Lady of the United States, Michelle Obama has become a role model in the awareness arena for healthy eating, sharing her homegrown recipes via her cookbook. Next celebrity chef? She has also become a fashion icon and has been named by Forbes Magazine as the eighth most powerful woman in the world.
***
***
First lady Michelle Obama speaks at the Democratic National Committee’s Women’s Leadership Forum in Washington….
***
First lady Michelle Obama speaks on the South Lawn of the White House in Washington, Monday, Oct. 17, 2011, during an event to honor schools that met the first lady’s goal to double the number of participants in the HealthierUS School Challenge in year.
***
Michelle Obama attends cultural performances in Brasilia, Brazil….
***
Michelle Obama introduces President Barack Obama at a DNC fundraiser at Gotham Hall, New York-
..
Michelle Obama gestures before introducing her husband President Barack Obama at a DNC fundraiser at Gotham Hall in New York. She’s mingled barefoot among Aspen’s elite, stirred a Vermont utility executive to tears and bucked up disenchanted New Yorkers. The 2012 presidential campaign is well under way for Michelle Obama, and the first lady is promising to put herself into the election effort like never before. More than a year from Election Day, she is hauling in millions in campaign cash and sketching a portrait of her husband drawn with an intimacy that no one else could duplicate.
***
***
Michelle Obama speaks to children at Christ Church College in Oxford, England.-
..
Michelle Obama speaks to children from Elizabeth Garrett Anderson school in London as they visit Christ Church College in Oxford, England.
***
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Dec 18 2011
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny Poetry, Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: anger, art, attitude, behavior, belt, body, butt, car, check, child, children, class, classroom, computer, control, depression, dinner, duty, earrings, education, educator, exam, example, eyes, fashion, food, freedom, funds, funny, God, granny, hairstyle, hands, hilarious, home, House, hug, hugs, humor, influence, internet, job, jokes, kisses, labor, lake, language, laughter, law, learning, lesson, life, lunch, moment, money, moral, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, movie, ocean, online, pants, parent, pastor, phone, pond, pool, prayer, preacher, priest, Professor, reading, recipe, rectum, reverend, rivers, road, role model, rules, school, sea, service, smiles, snack, snacks, stream, stress, style, task, teacher, television, test, today, touch, traffic, travel, treats, tutor, values, vehicle, voice, water, waterfall, waterfalls, words, work
.
Don’t Mess with Mom
====================
.
My son came home from school one day,
with a smirk upon his face.
He’d decided he was smart enough,
to put me in my place.
~*~
“Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that’s taught by Mr. Wright?
It’s all about the laws today,
The “Children’s Bill of Rights.”
~*~
It says I need not clean my room,
don’t have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
or speak, or what to wear.
~*~
I have freedom from religion,
and regardless what you say,
I don’t have to bow my head,
and I sure don’t have to pray.
~*~
I can wear earrings if I want,
and pierce my tongue & nose.
I can read & watch just what I like,
and get tattoos from head to toes.
~*~
And if you ever spank me,
I’ll charge you with the crime.
I’ll back up all my charges,
with the marks on my behind.
~*~
Don’t you ever touch me,
my body’s only for my use,
not for your hugs and kisses,
that’s just more child abuse.
~*~
Don’t preach about your morals,
like your mama did to you.
That’s nothing more than mind control,
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Dec 04 2011
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny and Hilarious Jokes, Nasty and Rude Jokes.
Tags: age, belief, birthday, body, breakfast, bus, car, channel, cheer, child, church, coffee, courage, day, diamonds, diet, dinner, duty, encouragement, era, exercise, experience, faith, fool, funny, gift, global, globe, gratitude, gym, health, hilarious, history, humanity, humor, instruction, instructions, job, jokes, journey, labor, language, laughter, leg, legs, life, listening, message, morning, moron, mother, path, present, road, sandwich, Saturday, service, smiles, snack, snacks, sound, sport, strength, stupid, sugar, Sunday, surprise, task, tea, teacher, teeth, television, thankfulness, time, today, traffic, travel, treats, trip, truck, universe, vampire, vehicle, voice, weight, woman, words, work, world
.
A WOMAN’S WEEK AT THE GYM
.
If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine.
.
Dear Diary,
.
For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 40 something years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.
.
MONDAY:
.
I started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She is something of a Greek goddess - with blonde hair,dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!! Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring! Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week-!!
.
TUESDAY:
.
I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda’s rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT-!! It’s a whole new life for me.
.
WEDNESDAY:
.
The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn’t try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot. Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the Hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other shit too.
.
THURSDAY:
.
Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl I couldn’t help being a half an hour late, it took me that long to tie my shoes. Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was
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Nov 03 2011