Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: assignment, doctor, funny, hilarious, homework, jokes, wife
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Leroy is a 20 year-old 5th grader. This is Leroy’s homework assignment.
He must use each vocabulary word in a sentence ..*
……….
1. Hotel – I gave my girlfriend crabs, and the ho tel everybody.
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2. Dictate – My girfriend say my dictate good.
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3. Catacomb – I saw Don King at da fight the other night. Man, somebody get that catacomb.
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4. Foreclose – If I pay alimony today, I got no money foreclose.
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Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: camp, funny, hilarious, jokes, man
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Seven guys were at deer camp. Three had to bunk two to a room.
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No one wanted to room with Steve because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn’t fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns.
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The first night, John slept in Steve’s room and came to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot. The rest of the guys said, “Man, what happened to you?”
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He said, “Steve snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night.”
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The next night it was Garry’s turn. In the morning, same thing–hair all standing up, eyes all blood-shot. Once again they asked, “Man, what happened to you? You look awful!”
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He said, “Man, that Steve shakes the roof. I couldn’t sleep a wink. I just watched him all night.”
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The third night was Herb’s turn. Herb was a big burly guy who loved to fish and hunt — a man’s man.
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Mar 06 2010
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: elderly, funny, hilarious, jokes, moment, phone, wife
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An elderly man was driving down the freeway when his cell phone rang.
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He answered it and it was his wife. She said, “Be careful, honey! I heard on the news that there is a car driving backwards on the freeway!”
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Mar 06 2010
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: bicycle, child, funny, hilarious, jokes
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“I was in a customer’s home one afternoon and
while I was talking to the customer, their 4 year old
little girl whose name was Michelle, tugged on my
pants leg and excitedly exclaimed, “I got a new
bicycle, do you want to see it?”
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I said, “Sure Michelle.” So off to the backyard we
went.
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Upon getting into the backyard, I saw a brand new
girl’s bicycle. “Boy, Michelle!! That’s a beautiful bicycle.”
I complimented. “Can you ride it?”
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“Yeah, I can ride it,” she said, then with a sad face
she pouted, “but it’s broke.”
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I looked at the new bicycle and couldn’t see anything
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: classroom, exam, funny, jokes, Professor, student, teacher
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An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question
final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array
of topics.
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The class was already seated and ready to go when
the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his
desk and wrote on the board: “Using everything we
have learned this semester, prove that this chair does
not exist.”
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Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled
in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: coffee, diner, funny, hilarious, jokes, restaurant, waitress
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Bill and Doug went into a diner that looked as though it
had seen better days. As they slid into a booth, Bill
wiped some crumbs from the seat. Then he took a napkin
and wiped some moisture from the table.
The waitress came over and asked if they wanted some
menus.
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“No thanks,” said Doug. “I’ll just have a cup of black
coffee.”
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“I’ll have black coffee, too,” Bill said. “And please