Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: age, alcohol, bar, beer, champagne, drunk, era, Europe, fool, funny, gin, graduation, hilarious, humor, idiot, Ireland, Irish, jokes, laughter, liquor, man, Mathematics, money, moron, pub, rum, school, scotch, smiles, tequila, time, twins, vodka, whiskey, wine
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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.
“Why of course,” comes the reply.
The first man then asks: “Where are you from?”
“I’m from Ireland,” replies the second man.
The first man responds: “You don’t say, I’m from Ireland too!
Let’s have another round to Ireland.”
“Of Course,” replies the second man.
Curious, the first man then asks: “Where in Ireland are you from?”
“Dublin,” comes the reply.
“I can’t believe it,” says the first man.
“I’m from Dublin too! Let’s have another drink to Dublin.”
“Of course,” replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: “What school did you go to?”
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: alcohol, bar, beer, brandy, champagne, cheer, drunk, funny, gin, hilarious, humor, jokes, laughter, light, liquor, music, nun, priest, restaurant, rum, scotch, smiles, tequila, time, vodka, whiskey, wine
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A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters.
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The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while ‘the lights would turn off.’
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Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.
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However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
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She walked up to the bartender, and asked, ‘May I please use the restroom?
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The bartender replied, ‘OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.’
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‘Well, in that case, I’ll just look the other way,’ said the nun.
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So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.
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Aug 11 2009
Posted: under "Jamaica Labrish Korner", Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: actor, actress, age, airport, alcohol, Alexander Bustamante, America, beauty, bliss, Britain, British, Bunny Grant, bus, car, cheer, church, classic, companion, contest, contestant, couple, culture, custom, dance, dialect, difference, doctor, drugs, earth, engagement, England, Englishman, era, fashion, festival, flight, food, fun, funny, funtime, game, gift, graduation, growth, happiness, heritage, highway, hilarious, history, holiday, Hollywood, home, hospital, House, humor, husband, Jamaica, Jamaican, job, jokes, jonkanoo, journey, joy, Kingston, language, laughter, license, life, lifestyle, lifetime, London, love, magazine, marriage, medication, medicine, memories, memory, minister, Miss Jamaica, Miss Lou, Miss World, model, money, music, Norman Manley, nurse, office, partner, party, passenger, pastor, path, patois, period, pharmacist, pharmacy, physician, plane, preacher, present, priest, prime minister, prize, queen, Queen Elizabeth, reggae, road, school, sermon, smiles, sport, sports, spouse, style, sugar, summer, Sunday, task, television, time, title, traffic, travel, treats, tropics, universe, vehicle, vernacular, wedding, West Indian, wife, words, work, world, youth
Miss Jamaica, Evelyn Andrade, Marries Dancing Partner Tony Verity
– Jet Magazine May 26, 1955
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Those who remember these shouldn’t still be working!!!!
— As a Jamaican you know you are getting old if:
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You had an exercise book with Queen Elizabeth and her husband on it
(instead of a ring binder).
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You used to listen to Redifussion.
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You wore Bata crepe to school, and bought Asham at the gate..
(Extra credit if you know what Asham was made of)
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You remember that the Lou and Ranny show used to come on at 7:00 PM
On a Sunday.
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You know what the initials T. A. D. P. Stand for.
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You know who Tony Verity was.
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You can name more than two of the characters in a Jonkanoo band.
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You know what boxing title Bunny Grant held.
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals.
Tags: age, alcohol, bar, beer, blessings, bliss, cemetery, champagne, choice, dad, drunk, duty, elderly, family, father, ghost, gift, gin, God, hands, happiness, job, joy, language, laughter, life, liquor, love, money, psalm, quotes, rum, scotch, scripture, seniors, smiles, task, tequila, time, today, truth, whiskey, wine, words, work, youth
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God has been most wonderfully good to us. When you
feel downhearted or discouraged, begin to count your blessings.
~ Anna Dengel, MMS
*** *** ***
“Happiness is a dividend on a well-invested life.”
– Duncan Stuart
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Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: alcohol, attorney, bar, beer, brandy, Bubba, champagne, court, food, funny, gin, health, hilarious, humor, jokes, judge, laughter, law, lawyer, man, redneck, restaurant, rules, rum, scotch, sleep, smiles, tequila, whiskey, wine, woman
Somewhere in the deep South, Bubba called an attorney and asked, “Is it true they’re suing the cigarette companies for causing people to get cancer?”
“Yes, Bubba, that is true.”
“And people are suing the fast food restaurants for making them fat and clogging their arteries with all them burgers and fries … is that true, mister lawyer?”
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Jun 20 2009
Posted: under General Poetry.
Tags: account, age, aid, air, alcohol, America, American, bank, beer, belief, brandy, cemetery, champagne, check, children, contribution, cow, designer, dictionary, dinner, dog, duty, earth, era, eyes, faith, family, fashion, fish, fishing, food, funds, gas, ghost, gin, global, globe, government, granny, highway, history, home, hope, House, humor, job, labor, land, language, laughter, license, life, lifestyle, lifetime, liquor, marriage, money, mother, mother-in-law, nation, nut, nuts, obituary, pants, parent, period, phone, politics, road, rum, school, scotch, security, service, smiles, snack, snacks, style, tablecloth, task, taxes, tequila, time, treats, universe, vehicle, vodka, water, wealth, whiskey, wine, words, work, world
Tax his land, Tax his bed, Tax the table At which he’s fed.
Tax his tractor, Tax his mule, Teach him taxes Are the rule.
Tax his work, Tax his pay, He works for peanuts Anyway!
Tax his cow, Tax his goat, Tax his pants, Tax his coat.
Tax his ties, Tax his shirt, Tax his work, Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco, Tax his drink, Tax him if he tries to think.
Tax his cigars, Tax his beers, If he cries, then tax his tears.
Tax his car, Tax his gas, Find other ways To tax his ass.
Tax all he has Then let him know, That you won’t be done till he has no dough.
..
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Apr 24 2009
