Posted: under "A Scripture A Day Keeps The Devil Away", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something".
Tags: advice, anger, arm, arms, assurance, beacon, belief, blessings, bliss, bridge, burden, candle, candles, Christ, Christian, Christianity, Christians, comfort, Comforter, courage, cross, day, depression, devil, embrace, encouragement, faith, fire, flame, God, hand, hands, happiness, highway, hope, inspiration, Jesus, journey, joy, King, language, leader, life, lifestyle, lifetime, light, load, Lord, love, lovingkindness, man, medication, medicine, might, movement, ocean, offer, others, path, peace, permission, power, praise, prayer, promise, Redeemer, relaxation, rest, rivers, road, satan, Savior, scripture, sea, service, sheep, shepherd, smiles, sound, storm, stream, strength, stress, struggles, sunshine, thorn, thorns, tips, today, torch, touch, travel, trial, trials, tribulation, trip, trust, truth, voice, water, weight, woman, words, worries, worry, worth
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When thou passest through the waters,
I will be with thee;
and through the rivers,
they shall not overflow thee:
when thou walkest through the fire,
thou shalt not be burned;
neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
– Isaiah 43:2
..
God’s word offers medicine for every one of our situations. We will encounter scorching ‘fires’ and turbulent ‘rivers’, but if we allow God to walk with us we will not be scorched by the fires nor drowned by the angry seas. We serve a God who says, “I will be with Thee”.
..
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Apr 26 2012
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny Poetry, Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: anger, art, attitude, behavior, belt, body, butt, car, check, child, children, class, classroom, computer, control, depression, dinner, duty, earrings, education, educator, exam, example, eyes, fashion, food, freedom, funds, funny, God, granny, hairstyle, hands, hilarious, home, House, hug, hugs, humor, influence, internet, job, jokes, kisses, labor, lake, language, laughter, law, learning, lesson, life, lunch, moment, money, moral, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, movie, ocean, online, pants, parent, pastor, phone, pond, pool, prayer, preacher, priest, Professor, reading, recipe, rectum, reverend, rivers, road, role model, rules, school, sea, service, smiles, snack, snacks, stream, stress, style, task, teacher, television, test, today, touch, traffic, travel, treats, tutor, values, vehicle, voice, water, waterfall, waterfalls, words, work
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Don’t Mess with Mom
====================
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My son came home from school one day,
with a smirk upon his face.
He’d decided he was smart enough,
to put me in my place.
~*~
“Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that’s taught by Mr. Wright?
It’s all about the laws today,
The “Children’s Bill of Rights.”
~*~
It says I need not clean my room,
don’t have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
or speak, or what to wear.
~*~
I have freedom from religion,
and regardless what you say,
I don’t have to bow my head,
and I sure don’t have to pray.
~*~
I can wear earrings if I want,
and pierce my tongue & nose.
I can read & watch just what I like,
and get tattoos from head to toes.
~*~
And if you ever spank me,
I’ll charge you with the crime.
I’ll back up all my charges,
with the marks on my behind.
~*~
Don’t you ever touch me,
my body’s only for my use,
not for your hugs and kisses,
that’s just more child abuse.
~*~
Don’t preach about your morals,
like your mama did to you.
That’s nothing more than mind control,
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Dec 04 2011
Posted: under Inspirationals.
Tags: aid, anger, author, boy, care, child, Christ, concern, dad, duty, encouragement, example, father, father-in-law, fence, friends, friendship, grand-dad, guidance, guide, heart, home, House, inspiration, Jesus, job, King, labor, language, listening, Lord, love, man, nail, nails, parent, praise, praises, Redeemer, role model, Savior, sheep, shepherd, smiles, son, success, task, tool, tools, words, work, youth
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THE FENCE
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There was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, to hammer a nail in the back fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Then it gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
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Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his
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Jul 10 2011
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: anger, bus, car, children, fun, funny, funtime, hilarious, humor, jokes, journey, laughter, license, man, money, road, short, sign, smiles, travel, trip, truck, vehicle, woman
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A woman drove a mini-van filled with a dozen screaming kids through the mall parking lot, looking for a space. Obviously frazzled, she coasted through a stop sign.
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“Hey, lady, have you forgotten how to stop?” yelled an irate man.
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: anger, brain, cemetery, companion, couple, devil, duty, exam, funny, ghost, government, hilarious, humor, husband, interview, job, jokes, labor, language, laughter, man, Mathematics, mind, obituary, partner, satan, skill, skills, smiles, sound, spouse, task, test, thought, time, tool, tools, voice, wife, woman, words, work
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There was an opening for an assassin at the FBI.
Three people applied for the job, two men and a woman.
All three were called in to interview on the same day.
..
First up was Ed. Ed walked into the room, and was asked
do you have what it takes to do this job? Ed quickly replied,
yes I do. The man then handed Ed a gun and was told that
his wife was in the next room - kill her.
..
Ed said there is
no way that I could kill my wife. The man then replied, you’re
free to go.
..
Next up was Bob. The man handed Bob a gun and said
your wife is in the next room - kill her. Bob went into the next
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Jun 22 2011
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: anger, boss, cashier, check, delight, duty, employee, employer, food, funny, humor, job, jokes, language, laughter, manager, Mathematics, money, short, smiles, supervisor, task, voice, woman, words, work
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I was in the express lane at the store quietly fuming.
.Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had
.
slipped into the check-out line pushing a
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cart piled high with groceries.
.
Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman
.
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May 31 2011