“SWEET, SWEET JAMAICA”

Waterfall at “The Ruins” in Ocho Rios, Jamaica

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I GUESS I may be getting just a teeny-weeny bit old, because I can remember when it was considered rude to whistle in front of adults, the biggest bad words pickney used to cuss were ‘blouse and skirt’,'rahtid’ and ‘blow-wow’; and slackness was talking big bwoy stories.  .. I am probably not so young anymore, I guess, because I can remember when people used to charter JOS bus to go to outing at Gunboat beach. And the beach dem was clean! And bad boys were the ones riding skate, and playing marbles and racing board horse in the gutter water after rain... I remember when children were afraid of Johnkunnu - now even police fraid a pickney, ’cause pickney a shotta!  ..   Call me archaic, but I remember when school children never had such a wide range of colourfully creative chemical concoctions and toxic adventures to choose from such as sweets and snacks. For example, I saw one recently marked cheese tricks and when you read the fine print carefully, you realized that the ingredients did not include any cheese - so-so tricks! ..  But I suppose it must be old age, because I also remember that children used to eat jackfruit, juneplum, naseberry, guinep, hogplum and tinkin toe; we used to relish treats like bustamante-backbone, drops, gizzada, toto, cut-cake and grater-cake. MEN USED TO DANCE WITH WOMEN after asking if they could have this dance!! ..  I must be clearly approaching dinosaur status, because I can vividly recall a period when independence time meant street dance on every corner, and we never had to import carnival to have revelling in the streets, and float parades were magnificent. I must have come from them dark ages, but I remember when man used to go party to dance with woman, not to “par wid man”, and women never had to walk naked to get attention. “Miss Jamaica Festival Queen 2008″ . But I am not quite ready for the rocking chair and adult diapers just yet. No papa! Still, I remember when Rasta was a lifestyle. Now dreadlocks is a hairstyle. I remember Read More Comments (4) Apr 02 2010 The Pool Party Posted: under Nasty and Rude Jokes. Tags: accident, action, age, air, alcohol, alligator, anger, attitude, bar, barbeque, beaches, beer, behavior, black, blacks, brandy, butt, car, carnival, cemetery, champagne, check, chicken, classic, color, colors, courage, dance, decision, drunk, era, exam, exercise, eyes, finger, fingers, fire, fish, fishing, flame, food, force, friends, friendship, funds, funny, garden, ghost, gin, gold, hand, hands, hell, hilarious, history, home, House, humor, invitation, jokes, lake, language, laughter, liquor, lunch, man, mansion, meal, meat, might, model, money, movement, neighbor, neighborhood, noise, obituary, ocean, pain, palace, party, period, pond, pool, power, pub, quiz, rectum, rivers, rolex, rum, sandwich, scotch, sea, smiles, smoke, snack, snacks, sound, sport, sports, spring, stream, strength, sugar, surprise, teeth, tequila, test, time, treats, veggie, veggies, vodka, war, water, wealth, weight, whiskey, wind, wine, winner, woman, words A rich white man in Georgia decided that he wanted to throw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbors. He also invited Larry, The only black guy in the neighborhood. He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion. Everyone was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating shrimp, oysters and BBQ and flirting with the women. At the height of the party, the host said, “I have a 10ft. man-eating gator in my pool and I’ll give a million dollars to anyone who jumps in.” The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash and everyone turned around and saw Larry in the pool! He was fighting the gator and beating its ass! Larry was jabbing the gator in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, doing all kinds of thing like head butts and chokeholds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping the gator through the air like some kind of judo instructor. The water was churning and splashing every where, both Larry and the gator were screaming and raising hell. Finally, Larry strangled the gator and left it floating on the top like a carnival goldfish. Larry then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief. Finally the host says, “Well, Larry I reckon I owe you a million Read More Comments (0) Jul 16 2008   May 2012 S M T W T F S « Apr       1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31   Categories "A Scripture A Day Keeps The Devil Away" "A Slice Of Life" "A TASTE of the TROPICS" "DEVOTIONAL for DIETERS" "DID YOU KNOW" "Jamaica Labrish Korner" "Jamaica Labrish ~ Louise Bennett" "Jamaica ~ Land Of Paradise" "Jamaican RING Games" "Jazzy REGGAE ~ Irie Riddim" "Life is precious handle with PRAYER!" 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