Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: accident, airline, attendant, bus, captain, conductor, cop, dialect, experience, flight, funny, hilarious, humor, Jamaican, jokes, journey, Kingston, language, laughter, man, money, officer, passenger, patois, patrolman, plane, police, service, sheriff, skill, smiles, traffic, trooper, vehicle, vernacular, woman, words
Ever wonder what it would be like if Jamaican buses were set up like airlines, with the flight attendant and captain giving safety instructions?
Bus driver speaking on the intercom: Welcome to Bus numba 40 running from Papine to Down Town Kingston. Please direct yuh attention to di ConDucta who will instruc’ yuh on our safety and model features.
ConDucta: Hail up massive! We want yuh fi know dat yuh a ride pon di safes’ bus dat run pon di Papine to Downtown route. The moggle of our bus is a 1980 Encava, own and operate by Rough Rider transports. Dis moggle can survive any adversities an’
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Sep 21 2008
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: American, bank, check, conductor, decision, destination, dialect, eyes, funds, funny, grown ups, highway, hilarious, humor, idea, Jamaican, jokes, journey, language, laughter, life, lifestyle, lifetime, loan, man, Mathematics, money, passenger, path, patois, perception, road, smiles, station, ticket, tour, tourist, traffic, train, travel, trip, vernacular, vision, voice, words, youth
Three Americans and three Jamaicans are traveling by an AMTRAK train to a conference. At the station, the three Americans each buy a ticket and watch as the three Jamaicans buy only a single ticket. “How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?” asked an American.
“Watch the ride my yute!” answers a Jamaican.
They all board the train. The Americans take their respective seats but all three Jamaicans cram into a restroom and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train is departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, “Ticket, please.” The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.
The Americans saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea.
So after the conference, the Americans decide to copy the Jamaicans on the return trip and save some money. When they get to the station,
they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Jamaicans don’t buy a ticket at all. “How are you going to travel without a ticket,” asks one perplexed American. “Watch the ride my yute!!” says a Jamaican.
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Jul 11 2008