THE GREAT PHYSICIAN

Posted: under "DID YOU KNOW".
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Welcome to the Great Physician
Office hours are as you come,
He’s a Specialist in all problems
And His day is never done.
He can heal a heart that’s broken
He can mend the spirit, too,
No matter what your ailment
He does have the cure for you.
His fee for service never alters
He serves rich and poor as well,
He’s our one chance for Salvation,
He alone saves us from Hell.
There’s no fee for services rendered
All He asks is that we believe,
That He bled and died to save us
And all His blessings we will receive.
Do you have a special problem
That is troubling you this hour?

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Then just simply leave it with Him
You can find no greater power.
Don’t delay in seeking treatment
Please, my friend, don’t hesitate,
For His office is soon closing
And He’ll shut and lock the gate.
I wouldn’t want you to suffer
While the Doctor’s so close by,
Your whole life will be much better
If my Physician you will try.
In Case of Emergencies . . .

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Comments (0) Jan 30 2014

“Kiss mi neck!”

Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
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stairway.jpg Stairway to Heaven image by godsrose123

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A Jamaican and a Trinidadian, waiting at the pearly gates, struck up a conversation. 

“How did you die?” the Trinidadian man asked the Jamaican.

 ”I froze to death mon”, said the Jamaican. 

“That’s awful! How does it feel to freeze to death?” asked the Trinidadian.

“Well brother, it was very uncomfortable at first but when the cold hit, my whole body started to shake and I got pain in my fingers and toes.

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Eventually, it became, a very calm way to die. I got numb and then I just drifted off, like dying in your sleep.”

 ”So how did you die Mon?” asked the Jamaican. 

“I had a heart attack”, said the Trinidadian. 

“You see, I did believe my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom and found her alone

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knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast

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Comments (2) Jul 12 2013

Blonde Easter

Posted: under Dumb Blonde Jokes.
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Little angel holding Easter daffodils by IronRodArt - Royce Bair

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Three blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.

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St. Peter asks the first blonde, “What is Easter?”

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The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy! It’s the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful…”

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“Wrong!” replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, “What is Easter?”

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The second blonde replies, “Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus.”

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St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she’s wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, “What is Easter?”

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The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, “I know what Easter is.”

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Comments (2) Apr 01 2010