Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: age, companion, couple, diabetes, diabetic, dialect, dreadlocks, era, funny, glasses, health, hilarious, history, humor, Jamaica, Jamaican, jokes, language, laughter, love, lovemaking, man, memory, noise, partner, patois, penis, period, pussy, rasta, rastafarian, rivers, sex, short, smiles, sound, stream, sugar, time, vagina, vernacular, voice, water, woman, words
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A Jamaican man was making love to his woman for the first time.
He suddenly screamed and ran out of the room. He came back with a glass of water and poured it
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Feb 15 2012
Posted: under "DID YOU KNOW", Advice & Tips.
Tags: advice, age, alcohol, aroma, beer, brandy, champagne, christmas, cold, direction, directions, duty, eggnog, eggs, era, food, fragrance, gin, glasses, hands, holiday, ice, ingredient, ingredients, instruction, instructions, job, labor, liquor, Mathematics, milk, perfume, period, recipe, rum, scotch, season, service, snow, sugar, task, taste, tequila, time, tips, tool, tools, treats, vodka, weight, whiskey, wine, winter, work
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This favorite holiday drink is easier to make than you think; simply simmer together heavy cream, sugar, and nutmeg, then gradually combine with eggs in the blender.
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Serves 4 | Hands-On Time: 05m | Total Time: 20m
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Ingredients
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2 cups heavy cream
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
4 large eggs
3/4 cup brandy
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Directions
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1. In a medium saucepan, bring the heavy cream, sugar, and nutmeg just to a simmer.
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Dec 26 2011
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: accident, age, blonde, body, car, color, colors, designer, elderly, era, exam, exercise, eyes, fashion, fool, funny, glasses, hair, health, hilarious, history, humor, idiot, jogger, jokes, journey, language, laughter, license, light, magazine, moron, newspaper, noise, period, phone, quiz, reading, relaxation, rest, road, seniors, sign, sleep, smiles, sound, stupid, style, test, time, travel, trip, vehicle, voice, words
Jane had been driving 16 hours straight and was still at least six hours away from her destination. It was almost eight o’clock in the morning and she was very tired.
After dozing off and nearly crashing into a telephone pole, she decided to pull onto a side road and rest.
Jane turned off the car and closed her eyes … drifting off to sleep, precious sleep …
When an old man in a bright blue jogging suit knocked on her window, scaring her half to death.
‘Sorry to wake you,’ he huffed, jogging in place. ‘But can you tell me what time it is?’
Jane glanced at her watch. ‘8:15,’ she said through the glass.
The old man thanked her, then left.
‘Just my luck,’ she muttered. ‘I’m parked on someone’s jogging route.’
With a sigh, she settled back into her seat and tried to fall asleep.
Two male joggers in their thirties knocked on her window. If she hadn’t been really tired, she would have found them cute. Now, they were just annoying.
‘Hi,’ the blonde jogger said.
‘Do you have the time?’ his brown-haired friend asked.
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Aug 01 2009
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "LOVE is LOVELY", Inspirationals.
Tags: age, anger, bank, beauty, bliss, cab, car, check, companion, compassion, couple, dance, destination, doctor, dress, earth, elderly, embrace, era, eyes, family, fashion, feeling, funds, girl, glasses, global, globe, granny, gratitude, hand, hands, happiness, hat, hats, history, home, hope, hospital, House, hug, hugs, husband, inspiration, journey, joy, kindness, kisses, land, letter, license, life, lifestyle, lifetime, love, mail, man, memories, mind, mirror, moment, money, mother, mother-in-law, movie, neighbor, neighborhood, nurse, others, partner, party, passenger, path, patient, period, photos, physician, relaxation, rest, road, seniors, smiles, sound, specialist, spouse, style, sunshine, surgeon, surprise, taxi, thankfulness, time, touch, traffic, travel, universe, vehicle, voice, wedding, wife, woman, world
I arrived at the house to pick-up a passenger and after waiting a few minutes I walked to the door and knocked. ‘Just a a minute’, answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.
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After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90’s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "DID YOU KNOW".
Tags: action, alcohol, attitude, bar, beauty, brandy, care, champagne, couple, devil, dinner, drunk, emotions, eyes, fashion, finger, fingers, friends, game, girl, glasses, gratitude, hairdo, hairstyle, hands, ideas, jacket, laughter, life, light, liquor, love, man, Mathematics, memories, moment, morning, music, others, personality, perspective, photos, power, pub, respect, scotch, show, smiles, sound, strength, thankfulness, thought, treats, waiter, waitress, whisper, wine, woman
They say the “devil is in the details,” but the other night, my friend and I were scanning the bar and noticing minor things about women. After reflecting on our observations, I put together four small things that guys notice that they don’t often point out to women. Here they are:
Hands
I study a girl’s hands pretty intensely. Beautiful hands can portray daintiness and strength at the same time. I notice manicures, and complexion. I imagine what it’s like to hold them. I’m not much of a hand holder, but pretty hands will turn me into a hand holder. I even watch how a girl grips things. There are definitely different objects and shapes that look amazing in a girl’s hands, such as a wine glass. A wine glass has delicate curves that play off a woman’s hands. When I notice fingers that are appealing to me, I imagine how those fingertips would feel.
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Dec 05 2008
Posted: under "Jamaica Labrish Korner", "SMILE" Jamaica ~ "Once You Go --- You Know", Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: age, alcohol, anger, anxiety, aroma, beer, boots, breakfast, car, Caribbean, cat, cemetery, champagne, children, Chinese, cold, cow, culture, custom, depression, dialect, dinner, era, eyes, family, fashion, food, fragrance, funny, ghost, gin, girl, glasses, highway, hilarious, history, home, horse, House, humor, ice, island, Jamaica, Jamaican, jokes, journey, language, laughter, lifestyle, light, liquor, man, mirror, Miss Lou, obituary, odor, others, path, patois, perfume, period, pumps, recipe, reflection, road, rum, scent, scotch, sex, smell, smiles, stress, style, sugar, Sunday, teeth, tequila, time, traffic, travel, treats, trip, vegetable, vegetables, veggie, veggies, vehicle, vernacular, vodka, whiskey, wine, wisdom, woman, words
Yu kno seh dem is a Jamaican wen dem…..
Express disgust by ’sucking’ or ‘kissing’ their teeth
Point with their mouth
‘Cut yeye’ when upset with someone
Wear a ‘frock’, not a dress
Refer to fancy shoes as ‘boot’
Stir the ice in their drinks to make it colder
Take the ice in their mouth and spit it back into the glass while drinking
Eat the ice loudly when the ‘drinks’ is finished
Refer to vegetables, yams, green bananas, etc as ‘hard food’ or just ‘food’
Strip sugar cane with their teeth
Refer to any traveling distance as ‘jus’ roun’ di car-nah!’
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Nov 29 2008