Net Miles Of Smiles

One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blonde curly hair and the biggest blue eyes.

She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said, “what are you supposed to say sweetheart?”

The little girl looks up at the woman and says “Twick or Tweat!”

The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child, “Go ahead honey say it just one more time.”

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Comments (0) Oct 31 2008

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going.

So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.

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Comments (0) Oct 30 2008

• You ask for high fiber candy only.

• When someone drops a candy bar in your bag, you lose your balance and fall over.

• You get winded from knocking on the door.

• You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.

• When the door opens you yell, “Trick or…” and can’t remember the rest.

• You have to carefully choose a costume that won’t dislodge your hairpiece.

• People say, “Great Keith Richards mask!” and you’re not wearing a mask.
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  Comments (0) Oct 30 2008

(You may find some of these ingredients hard to come by. Even the best-supplied kitchens occasionally run short of hawk toenails. And grubs and maggots are at times out of season. We’ve thought of some substitutions that may yield acceptable results. They’re in parentheses.)* 1 1/4 pound ground goblin gizzards (ground beef, 15% fat)
..

* 1 medium eye of Cyclops (onion)
* 1 15-ounce can soft-shelled beetles, drained–beetle juice is to be avoided (kidney beans)
* 1 28-ounce can blood of bat (V-8 juice)
* 1/8 teaspoon pureed wasp (prepared mustard)
* 1/4 teaspoon common dried weed (oregano)
* 1 dash Red-tailed hawk toenails (crushed red pepper)
* 2 teaspoon ground sumac blossom (chili powder)
* 1 teaspoon hemlock (honey or sugar)

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Comments (0) Oct 30 2008

Boogieman: The guy who passes time at a stoplight picking
his nose.

Coffin: What you do when you get a piece of popcorn stuck in
your throat.

Frankenstein: Hot dog and a mug of beer.

Full Moon: What your repairman reveals when he bends over to
fix your fridge.

Goblin: How you eat the Snickers bars you got for Halloween.

Invisible Man: What a guy becomes when there’s housework to
be done.

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Comments (0) Oct 15 2008

>>>>>> You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when:
>>>>>>
>>>>>> 10. You get winded from knocking on the door.

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>>>>>>
>>>>>> 9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you.
>>>>>>

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>>>>>>

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