Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny Poetry, Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: anger, art, attitude, behavior, belt, body, butt, car, check, child, children, class, classroom, computer, control, depression, dinner, duty, earrings, education, educator, exam, example, eyes, fashion, food, freedom, funds, funny, God, granny, hairstyle, hands, hilarious, home, House, hug, hugs, humor, influence, internet, job, jokes, kisses, labor, lake, language, laughter, law, learning, lesson, life, lunch, moment, money, moral, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, movie, ocean, online, pants, parent, pastor, phone, pond, pool, prayer, preacher, priest, Professor, reading, recipe, rectum, reverend, rivers, road, role model, rules, school, sea, service, smiles, snack, snacks, stream, stress, style, task, teacher, television, test, today, touch, traffic, travel, treats, tutor, values, vehicle, voice, water, waterfall, waterfalls, words, work
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Don’t Mess with Mom
====================
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My son came home from school one day,
with a smirk upon his face.
He’d decided he was smart enough,
to put me in my place.
~*~
“Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that’s taught by Mr. Wright?
It’s all about the laws today,
The “Children’s Bill of Rights.”
~*~
It says I need not clean my room,
don’t have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
or speak, or what to wear.
~*~
I have freedom from religion,
and regardless what you say,
I don’t have to bow my head,
and I sure don’t have to pray.
~*~
I can wear earrings if I want,
and pierce my tongue & nose.
I can read & watch just what I like,
and get tattoos from head to toes.
~*~
And if you ever spank me,
I’ll charge you with the crime.
I’ll back up all my charges,
with the marks on my behind.
~*~
Don’t you ever touch me,
my body’s only for my use,
not for your hugs and kisses,
that’s just more child abuse.
~*~
Don’t preach about your morals,
like your mama did to you.
That’s nothing more than mind control,
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Dec 04 2011
Posted: under Advice & Tips, Inspirationals.
Tags: accomplishment, accomplishments, action, advice, age, anxiety, argument, beauty, belief, blessings, bliss, boss, candle, candles, care, change, children, class, classroom, day, deed, deeds, depression, dream, dreams, dress, duty, elderly, empathy, energy, enthusiasm, era, exercise, faith, family, feeling, feelings, forgiveness, friends, fun, funtime, gratitude, happiness, healing, history, inspiration, job, joy, labor, laughter, leader, learning, lesson, life, lifetime, link, love, man, manager, Mathematics, memory, morning, music, occasion, others, peace, photos, present, purpose, relaxation, rest, school, seniors, short, show, sleep, smiles, stress, supervisor, task, thankfulness, thought, time, tips, today, touch, vampire, video, woman, work
.
CLICK
.
on the link below
.
OR
.
copy & paste into your browser…
.
Read More
Nov 06 2011
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: action, advice, aid, anxiety, attitude, behavior, belief, blessings, burden, comfort, courage, cross, depression, difference, drugs, eyes, faith, finance, future, God, heart, help, humanity, inspiration, language, lesson, life, listening, load, love, man, medication, medicine, moment, money, mountain, obedience, others, pain, peace, prayer, rain, rainbow, sound, storm, strength, stress, struggles, surprise, tips, trust, understanding, voice, waiter, weight, wisdom, woman, words, worries
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Let Go
=======
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One day while climbing towards a high cliff a man slipped and
fell over the edge.
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Frantic - he grabbed at a branch jutting out from a tree and
yelled out,
.
“Oh, God, help me.”
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He looked down while holding on tight and saw only jagged rocks.
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Clutching even tighter to the branch he cried out again,
.
“God…Please help me.”
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Suddenly he felt God’s presence and heard God ask,
.
“My son, what can I do for you?’
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The man, somewhat relieved, answered,
.
“Please God, help me. Save me.”
.
God said quietly,
.
“Do you love me?
.
Do you trust me?
.
Do you believe in me?”
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“Yes, yes, I love you. I trust you and I believe in you,”
the man shouted.
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“Well, if indeed you love me, trust me, and believe in me,
.
LET GO.”
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With some hesitation and another look below at the jagged rocks,
the man asked,
.
“Is there anybody else up there I can talk to?”
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We often seek other answers when our real answer can only come
when we “Let Go” of some things.
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Though the above is an often-told joke, it is a true parable.
So often in counseling, I tell people the same thing.
.
“You have got to let go. That situation is killing you.
It is killing your peace, your finances, and your future.
.
You must let go!”
.
Often they will inwardly feel just as the hanging man asked,
.
“Is there anybody else that I can talk to, because I am afraid
to let go? I know the situation is killing me, that’s why I’m
here. I know that what I am holding on to is destined to die.
I know I cannot fully live while I remain embraced with it.
.
But I am soooo… afraid.
.
Afraid that I might fall if I let go.”
.
Like a person on drugs, you often must “come down” before you
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Jul 24 2010
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: accident, advice, age, aim, air, anger, babies, baby, beacon, beauty, belief, bell, bells, Bible, blessings, bliss, bouquet, breath, bridge, brilliance, burden, cancer, candle, candles, care, cemetery, challenge, check, Christ, clerk, cloud, clouds, cold, color, colors, comfort, Comforter, companion, concentration, couple, courage, creek, cross, cure, dad, depression, destination, divorce, doctor, drugs, encouragement, era, exam, experience, eyes, faith, family, father, feeling, feelings, fire, flame, florist, flowers, focus, force, friends, friendship, funds, gas, gem, gems, genuine, ghost, glory, goal, God, goodness, grace, gratitude, guidance, gynecologist, hair, hairstyle, happiness, healing, health, heart, highway, history, holiday, holidays, home, House, husband, ice, inspiration, Jesus, journey, joy, King, language, laughter, learning, lesson, letter, life, lifestyle, lifetime, light, load, Lord, love, mail, man, marriage, Mathematics, might, mind, moment, money, mountain, noise, obituary, ocean, others, pain, partner, path, perfection, period, phone, physician, power, prayer, promise, quiz, rain, rainbow, reading, Redeemer, rivers, rose, roses, Savior, sea, shape, shapes, sheep, shepherd, size, smiles, son, sound, source, specialist, spouse, spring, stream, strength, stress, struggles, sunshine, surgeon, surprise, teaching, test, thankfulness, Thanksgiving, thorn, thorns, thought, time, tips, torch, touch, travel, treasure, trials, tribulation, trip, triumph, triumphs, truck, trust, truth, vacation, value, vehicle, victory, voice, water, weight, wife, wind, woman, wonder, words, worries, worry
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The Blessing Of Thorns
=======================
..
Sandra felt as low as the heels of her shoes as she pushed
against a November gust and the florist shop door. Her life had
been easy, like a spring breeze. Then in the fourth month of
her second pregnancy, a minor automobile accident stole her
ease.
..
During this Thanksgiving week she would have delivered a son.
She grieved over her loss. As if that weren’t enough, her
husband’s company threatened a transfer. Then her sister, whose
annual holiday visit she coveted, called saying she could not
come.
..
What’s worse, Sandra’s friend infuriated her by suggesting her
grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to
empathize with others who suffer. “She has no idea what I’m
feeling,” thought Sandra with a shudder.
..
“Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?” she wondered aloud. For a
careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-
ended her? For an airbag that saved her life but took that of
her child?
..
“Good afternoon, can I help you?”
..
The shop clerk’s approach startled her.
..
“I….I need an arrangement, “stammered Sandra. “For
Thanksgiving?
..
Do you want beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to
challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the
Thanksgiving Special?” asked the shop clerk.
..
“I’m convinced that flowers tell stories,” she continued.
..
“Are you looking for something that conveys ‘gratitude’ this
Thanksgiving?
..
“Not exactly!” Sandra blurted out. “In the last five months,
everything that could go wrong has gone wrong. ” Sandra
regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the shop clerk
said, “I have the perfect arrangement for you.”
..
Then the door’s small bell rang, and the shop clerk said, “Hi
Barbara…let me get your order.” She politely excused herself
and walked toward a small workroom, then quickly reappeared,
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Apr 06 2010
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals.
Tags: achievement, experience, family, focus, friends, inspiration, Jesus, laughter, lesson, life, Lord, praise, student, target, teacher
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A young lady named Sally, relates an experience she had in a seminary class, given by her teacher, Dr. Smith. She says Dr. Smith was known for his elaborate object lessons.
..
One particular day, Sally walked into the seminary and knew they were in for a fun day. On the wall was a big target and on a nearby table were many darts. Dr. Smith told the students to draw a picture of someone that they disliked or someone who had made them angry, and he would allow them to throw darts at the person’s picture.
..
Sally’s girlfriend drew a picture of a girl who had stolen her boyfriend. Another friend drew a picture of his little brother. Sally drew a picture of a former friend, putting a great deal of detail into her drawing, even drawing pimples on the face. Sally was pleased at the overall effect she had achieved.
..
The class lined up and began throwing darts, with much laughter
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals.
Tags: airport, attention, celebration, comfort, conference, core, country, decision, direction, efforts, experience, focus, friends, harbor, history, hotel, humility, inspiration, laughter, lesson, life, memorial, mission, moment, motivation, progress, reality, relaxation, success, thought, value, values, vision
Why are core values critical to our success in business and in life? Because our values are critical guides for making important decisions. And when in doubt they cut through the fog like a beacon in the night.
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John Blumberg has written the best book we’ve ever read on how we build value…with values. And if there was ever a time in the history of this great country that we need to re-visit our core values…the time is NOW.
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Enjoy an excerpt from John’s book, Good to the Core…Building Value with Values.
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An Excerpt from
Good to the Core
by John Blumberg
.
U.S.S. Arizona Memorial, Pearl Harbor, Hawaii
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I was in Honolulu to speak at a large national conference. I scheduled an extra day onto the trip since I had never been to Honolulu and because a few great friends were also at the conference. The day after the conference, we awoke at the crack of dawn to visit Pearl Harbor. As we stood above and looked down upon the sunken USS Arizona, the depth of our experience came to life. It was moving and humbling.
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Upon our return to the hotel, I had some time to spare before departing to the airport. A couple of my friends and I decided to rent a raft large enough to hold three adults. We targeted the white-capped waves, out in the distance, as our destination. With the incoming waves, we had a hard time getting away from the shore. At first, there seemed to be enormous momentum keeping us “grounded.” Slowly, but surely, we began to make progress. It seemed to get easier. We eventually got within a few feet of the whitecaps and decided to board our raft and relax as a celebration of our efforts. It was in our moment of pause that we felt the reality