Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: advice, age, Christ, day, elderly, flowers, God, guidance, inspiration, Jesus, life, Lord, man, minister, moment, pastor, path, preacher, priest, respect, rose, roses, secret, seniors, sermon, tips, trust, wisdom
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God’s Rosebud
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A new minister
was walking with an older,
more seasoned minister
in the garden one day.
..
Feeling a bit insecure
about what God
had for him to do,
he was asking the older preacher
for some advice.
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The older preacher
walked up to a rosebush
and handed the young preacher
a rosebud and told him
to open it
without tearing off any petals.
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The young preacher
looked in disbelief
at the older preacher
and was trying to figure out
what a rosebud
could possibly have to do
with his wanting to know
the will of God
for his life and ministry.
..
But because of his great respect
for the older preacher,
he proceeded to try to unfold the rose,
while keeping every petal intact.
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It wasn’t long
before he realized
how impossible
this was to do.
..
Noticing the younger preacher’s
inability to unfold the rosebud
without tearing it,
the older preacher began
to recite the following poem…
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May 21 2010
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: child, church, funny, hilarious, jokes, Little Johnny, man, minister, mother, parent, pastor, preacher, priest, sermon, short, smiles, woman
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Johnny’s Mother looked out the window and noticed him “playing church” with their cat.
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He had the cat sitting quietly and he was preaching to it.
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She smiled and went about her work.
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A while later she heard loud meowing and hissing and ran back to the open window to see Johnny baptizing the
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Apr 29 2010
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: belief, challenges, Christian, depression, faith, focus, friends, glory, God, inspiration, journey, learning, life, link, listening, love, minister, music, prayer, process, scripture, trust, video, world
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I have a dear friend who is a minister. We talk almost every day, and she has a way of counseling, planting seeds and providing insight that makes you think YOU came up with the answer or solution. I often run my issues of life past her. Recently, we were having a conversation about how God is working things out of me and purging me of some of my sinful ways so that He can use me. She laughed when I shared with her that the process is no fun. She tried to convince me that the process isn’t so bad, when finally and adamantly I told her that this process is absolutely no fun, but I’m going through it because I want God to get me where He wants me, and I don’t want to have to come this way again. We both laughed at that because she knew exactly what I meant.
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Too often, as Christians, we like to say the ‘politically correct’ things, sugar coat what I call our ‘pruning process’ and make everything sound like it’s just hunky-dory. “Oh, I just want God to use me for His Glory,” or “I can’t wait to see how God is going to work this out.” Well, I’m more inclined to ‘be real’ and call it like I see it. It’s not always pretty, fun or something to look forward to. Sometimes it’s difficult, uncomfortable and painful to go through some of the things that God allows in our lives. It doesn’t make me love Him any less, nor do I want Him to stop preparing me for the things He has in store for me. But the reality is: it’s not always fun or pleasant on this journey; not if you’re doing it right.
There are some days when I get tired, discouraged or just want to quit, and I start thinking what’s the use? But I’m drawn to and
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: baby, Big Boy, class, divorce, doctor, eyes, family, father, funny, hilarious, Jamaican, jokes, minister, mother, parents, pastor, preacher, school, student, Sunday, teacher, vision
Picturesque view of a sugar plantation, Jamaica
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One day when Big Boy was in class, the teacher asked…
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“Who built the ark?”
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Student: “Big Boy, you know?”
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Big Boy: “Know wha??”
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Teacher: “That is right, Big Boy, Noah built the ark”
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Big boy went to school and heard other students using ‘raas’; not
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes, Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: baby, cop, elderly, funny, hilarious, jokes, laughter, Little Johnny, minister, money, pastor, police, preacher, priest, school, sermon, short, Sunday, teacher, wedding, wife
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1. Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, “Why is the bride dressed in white?” “Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.” The child thought about this for a moment then said, “So why the groom wearing black?”
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2. A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed, “Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late! Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late!” While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushed herself off, and started running again! As she ran she once again began to pray “Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late…But please don’t shove me either!”
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3. Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, “My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.” The second boy says, “That’s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100.” The third boy says, “I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!”
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4. An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, “They wouldn’t take me out while I was alive, I don’t want them to take me out when I’m dead.”
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5. A police recruit was asked during the exam, “What would you do
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: baby, children, elderly, family, funny, gift, hilarious, jokes, minister, money, pastor, preacher, priest, wife
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There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby so he went before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher’s family expanded, so would his paycheck.
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After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the Congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher’s salary.
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There was much yelling and bickering about how much the clergyman’s additional children were costing the church. Finally,