Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: age, bishop, cemetery, church, culture, custom, dialect, elderly, era, funny, ghost, hilarious, history, humor, Jamaica, Jamaican, jokes, language, laughter, life, lifestyle, lifetime, man, marriage, minister, obituary, others, pastor, patois, period, pope, preacher, priest, reverend, seniors, sermon, short, smiles, time, touch, vernacular, wedding, woman, words
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Mi hate when mi go a weddin and di ol’ people dem a
jook mi inna mi side an seh
“a yuh nex, a yuh nex”.
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May 08 2012
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: activity, clothing, designer, dialect, dumb, exercise, fashion, fool, fruit, fruits, funny, girl, granny, hilarious, home, House, humor, idiot, Jamaican, jokes, language, laughter, moron, mother, mother-in-law, patois, plant, plants, silly, smiles, stupid, style, sugar, surprise, treats, vernacular, words
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A girl came home with a bag of mangoes. Her mother said,
“Gal, didn’t I tell you not to climb dat tree?”
“The boys will see your panty.”
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The girl replied,
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Apr 15 2012
Posted: under "Jamaica Labrish Korner", "Jazzy REGGAE ~ Irie Riddim", "SMILE" Jamaica ~ "Once You Go --- You Know", "Welcome to JAMrock ~ JAMAICA ~ NO PROBLEM".
Tags: anniversary, athlete, beaches, beauty, black, blessings, bliss, Blue Mountain, Bob Marley, brilliance, Britain, British, care, Caribbean, celebration, celebrity, cheerfulness, color, colors, country, dance, designer, destination, dialect, diamonds, dinner, dreadlocks, Dunn's River Falls, energy, exercise, fashion, food, foods, generation, generations, genius, girl, gold, government, granny, hand, happiness, humor, icon, inspiration, island, Jamaica, Jamaican, journey, joy, Kingston, land, language, laughter, leader, legacy, legend, life, lifestyle, lifetime, link, London, love, man, Montego Bay, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, movement, music, musician, nation, nature, Negril, North Coast, northcoast, Ocho Rios, palace, palm, palms, paradise, party, patois, period, pride, prime minister, Prince, queen, Queen Elizabeth, rasta, rastafarian, reggae, resorts, rhythm, riches, Rita Marley, rivers, Rose Hall, Rosehall, royalty, skill, skills, smiles, soil, souvenir, sport, sports, spouse, St Ann, style, sunset, sunshine, talent, time, title, tour, tourist, travel, tribute, trip, trophy, unique, Usain Bolt, vernacular, video, vigor, warmth, waterfalls, wealth, wife, winner, wishes, woman, words, worry
***
Irie!!!
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Party Prince Harry danced his socks off in blue suede shoes during his royal visit to Jamaica.
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The prince was visiting Kingston when he was pulled to his feet by attractive
Chantol Dormer.
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The 27-year-old royal proved that his rhythm was on par with jammin’ style as he boogey-down to a rendition of reggae legend Bob Marley’s “One Love”.
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That night Harry attended a black tie state dinner with Prime Minister
Mrs Portia Simpson.
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In a well-received speech the prince had his audience eating out of his hand with a few jokes in the local patois.
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He said: ‘I count it a great privilege to be standing here tonight, representing The Queen in Jamaica on her Diamond Jubilee. Her Majesty has asked me to extend her great good wishes to you all, and is sorry that she can’t be here - so you’re stuck with me… but don’t worry, cos every liddle ting gonna be aright! ‘
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‘Your vibrancy and vigour, your wonderful welcome to visitors and your island’s natural beauties - all combine to make Jamaica unique. The Queen recognised this.
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Mar 14 2012
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: age, aid, anxiety, bank, belief, brain, bridge, burden, care, caring, check, community, compassion, contribution, cross, decision, depression, destination, dialect, donation, era, exam, example, exercise, eyes, faith, funds, funny, gift, God, heart, highway, hilarious, history, home, hope, House, humor, Jamaica, Jamaican, jokes, journey, language, laughter, legs, letter, listening, load, loan, love, mail, man, mind, model, money, neighbor, office, others, pain, path, patois, pencil, period, prayer, present, quiz, reading, road, robber, role model, sharing, smiles, spirit, stress, struggles, surprise, test, thief, thought, time, token, traffic, travel, trial, trials, trip, trust, vernacular, village, weight, woman, wonder, words, worries, worry
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A man became desperate after praying to God to help him. Not seeing any help coming to him he decided to write to God instead.
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He wrote, “Gad mi tiad fi pray an yuh nah ansa mi. Sumtime mi wanda if yuh caan hear mi. Suh mi tink it betta fi mi write yuh caa mi kno yuh wi read it.
Gad mi bruk an only a beg yuh 3 tousand dallas. Tanx!”
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He went to the post office and mailed his letter to
Heaven District, Heaven P.O.
The post mistress not knowing where to send the letter decided to read it.
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Moved by it, all the workers contributed money but could only arrive at 2500 dollars. Regardless,
they sent it to the man
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A few weeks later he picked up his mail at the post office, rushed home and was shocked to find only Read More
Mar 08 2012
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes, Nasty and Rude Jokes.
Tags: cat, child, children, choice, dad, dialect, dinner, exam, father, father-in-law, food, funny, goat, granny, hilarious, home, House, humor, Jamaican, jokes, language, laughter, meal, meat, mother, mother-in-law, noise, patois, pussy, quiz, smiles, son, sound, surprise, test, treats, vagina, vernacular, voice, words
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A woman cooked goat meat but didn’t tell the kids what it was.
They asked for a clue and she told them it was dad’s favorite.
The son screamed,
Read More
Mar 08 2012
Posted: under "Jamaica ~ Land Of Paradise", "SMILE" Jamaica ~ "Once You Go --- You Know", "Welcome to JAMrock ~ JAMAICA ~ NO PROBLEM".
Tags: actor, actress, age, air Jamaica, Alexander Bustamante, Alton Ellis, anniversary, anthem, army, art, artist, attractions, awards, beaches, beauty, bird, black, blacks, blessings, bliss, Bob Marley, Boris Gardiner, brilliance, Bunny Grant, Caribbean, caring, carnival, celebration, celebrity, ceremony, champion, championship, cheer, Colin Powell, color, colors, comedian, comedy, community, competition, concert, country, courage, craft, crown, culture, custom, dance, dancer, determination, dialect, Dr Patrice Smith, education, Enid Cumberland, era, faith, festival, flag, flight, flowers, food, foods, force, fun, funtime, gold, government, Gregory Isaacs, happiness, helicopter, heritage, hero, history, home, hope, icon, independence, Independence Day, inspiration, intelligence, island, Jamaica, Jamaica Defense Force, Jamaican, Jimmy Cliff, joy, Keith Stewart, Kingston, land, language, laughter, leader, leadership, legend, life, lifestyle, lifetime, link, love, man, Marcus Garvey, meaning, memories, memory, message, military, Miss Jamaica, Miss Lou, Miss Universe, Miss World, Montego Bay, movie, music, nation, nature, Negril, neighbor, neighborhood, Newton Marshall, Norman Manley, North Coast, northcoast, Ocho Rios, Oliver Samuels, others, pageant, palace, palm, paradise, party, patois, peace, period, perseverance, photos, pilot, plane, play, pledge, power, pride, prime minister, queen, Queen Elizabeth, reggae, resort, respect, Rex Nettleford, rivers, Rose Hall, Rosehall, sceneries, scenery, scientist, sea, service, sharing, show, singer, skill, smiles, soil, soldier, Sonia Pottinger, sport, sports, St Ann, strength, sugar, sunshine, talent, time, Tinga Stewart, title, tourism, tourist, tourists, Trelawny, troops, tropics, unity, Up Park Camp, Usain Bolt, vernacular, video, views, village, water, waterfalls, wealth, West Indian, Westmoreland, winner, wisdom, woman, words
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PRIDE IN BEING A JAMAICAN
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(Join us at www.Jamaicalives.org)
“As we approach Jamaica’s 50th anniversary I am reminded of what Jamaica means to me — and the people who served with me in the Jamaica Defense Force. I became a…”
- Wayne D Russell
…
Jamaica Lives - Wayne D Russell
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click on this link (and others to right)
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Feb 16 2012