Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: boy, butt, cop, funny, hand, hilarious, humor, jokes, kisses, laughter, officer, patrolman, policeman, rectum, sheriff, short, smiles, tool, tools, trooper
.
A policeman caught a nasty little boy with a penknife in one
hand and a squirrel in the other.
.
“Now listen here,” the policeman said, “whatever you do to
that poor, defenseless creature, I shall personally do to
you.”
.
Read More
May 31 2011
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: Canada, Canadian, car, check, cop, dialect, drunk, funny, hilarious, humor, Jamaica, Jamaican, jokes, language, laughter, license, man, money, officer, patois, patrolman, policeman, sheriff, smiles, traffic, vehicle, vernacular, West Indian, woman, words
A Canadian Highway Patrolman pulled a car over and told the Guyanese driver that because he was wearing his seat belt he had just won $5,000 in the Province safety competition.
.
‘What are you going to do with the money?’
asked the policeman.
.
‘Well, I goin an get a drivin license,’ he answered.
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: accident, America, American, attorney, bailiff, bus, car, check, cop, court, emotion, eyes, feelings, funds, funny, highway, humor, jail, jokes, journey, judge, language, laughter, lawyer, license, man, money, mood, morning, officer, others, patrolman, perception, policeman, road, sheriff, short, smiles, tour, traffic, travel, trip, trooper, truck, vehicle, woman, words
The judge had not yet put in an appearance in the San Diego traffic court. When the bailiff entered the courtroom, he sensed the nervousness of the traffic offenders awaiting their ordeal.“Good morning, ladies and gentlemen,” he said. Read More
Apr 24 2009
Posted: under Nasty and Rude Jokes.
Tags: cop, couple, funny, hilarious, jokes, policeman, wife
The husband leans over and asks his wife, ‘Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.’
..
‘Yes’, she says, ‘I remember it well.’
..
‘OK,’ he says, ‘How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time’s sake?’
Apr 01 2009
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: age, alcohol, bar, beer, bike, car, champagne, cop, drugs, drunk, fashion, fool, funny, gin, hilarious, home, House, humor, idiot, jail, jokes, laughter, license, money, moron, neighbor, officer, party, patrolman, pharmacist, pharmacy, police, policeman, pub, restaurant, robber, rum, sandwich, scotch, sheriff, smiles, spring, stupid, tequila, traffic, trooper, vehicle, vodka, wine
HE DOESN’T KNOW JACK
A carjacker upset by his noisy neighbors in Bonita Springs, Fla., drove to the sheriff’s office in a car he had recently carjacked to report the disturbance.
…
JUST HANGING OUT
A man entered a sandwich shop in Hendersonville, N.C., wearing a mask over his face and a pair of very baggy pants. When he tried to get to the cash register, he fell over a counter, then ran out of the restaurant empty-handed. Then, as he tried to climb over a fence, his baggy pants got caught on a fence post, leaving him hanging upside down until the police arrived and unsnagged him.
Read More
Jan 23 2009
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", "LOVE is LOVELY", "When You're Down to Nothing God's UP to Something", Inspirationals.
Tags: age, army, attention, baby, bell, birthday, bliss, car, celebration, cemetery, chance, cheer, child, Christ, christmas, coffee, cold, companion, company, compassion, cop, couple, day, devil, diamond, dinner, doctor, duty, elderly, family, food, fool, gas, ghost, gift, God, gunman, hand, happiness, heart, holiday, holidays, home, House, humor, husband, idiot, inspiration, jacket, Jesus, jewelry, job, journey, joy, King, language, laughter, leather, life, light, Lord, love, man, medication, medicine, memories, military, money, morning, moron, office, officer, others, pants, paramedics, partner, path, patrolman, phone, physician, plane, policeman, present, rain, reason, ring, road, robber, satan, Savior, season, seniors, sheriff, sin, smiles, snow, son, sound, specialist, spirit, spouse, station, stranger, stupid, surgeon, surprise, task, thief, thought, touch, traffic, travel, trooper, truck, trust, vehicle, water, wealth, winter, woman, words, work, worth, youth
This will really touch your heart.
…..
This story is a little long but worth the time to read it!
…..
Happy New Year!!
…..
The old man sat in his gas station on a cold Christmas Eve. He hadn’t been anywhere in years since his wife had passed away. It was just another day to him. He didn’t hate Christmas, just couldn’t find a reason to celebrate.
..
He was sitting there looking at the snow that had been falling for the last hour and wondering what it was all about when the door opened and a homeless man stepped through. Instead of throwing the man out, Old George as he was known by his customers, told the man to come and sit by the heater and warm up. “Thank you, but I don’t mean to intrude,” said the stranger. “I see you’re busy, I’ll just go.” “Not without something hot in your belly.” George said. He turned and opened a wide mouth Thermos and handed it to the stranger. “It ain’t much, but it’s hot and tasty, “Stew … Made it myself. When you’re done, there’s coffee and it’s fresh.”
..