| GOOD SAMARITAN..
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the
Good Samaritan.
She asked the class, “If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all
wounded and
bleeding, what would you do?”
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, “I think I’d throw
up.”
..
DID NOAH FISH?
..
A Sunday school teacher asked, “Johnny, do you think Noah did a
lot of fishing when
he was on the Ark ?” “No,” replied Johnny.
“How could he, with just two worms.”
..
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
..
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most
quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23 .
She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter.
Little Rick was excited about the task - but he just couldn’t remember the Psalm.
After much practice, he could barely get past the first line.
On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation,
Ricky was so nervous.
When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly,
“The Lord is my Shepherd, and that’s all I need to know.”
..
UNANSWERED PRAYER
..
The preacher’s 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always
paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his sermon.
One day, she asked him why. “Well, Honey,” he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages. “I’m asking the Lord to help me preach a
good sermon.”
“How come He doesn’t answer it?” she asked.
..
BEING THANKFUL
..
A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, “So your mother
says your prayers for you each night?
That’s very commendable.
What does she say?”
The little boy replied, “Thank God he’s in bed!”
..
ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS
..
When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal (current and past).
For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli
would say, “and all girls.”
This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing.
My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, “Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?”
Her response, “Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying ‘All Men’!”
..
SAY A PRAYER
..
Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his
Grandmother’s house.
Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served.
When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away.
“Johnny!
Read More
 Dec 06 2011
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: age, alcohol, attorney, bar, beer, brain, champagne, companion, couple, court, drunk, elderly, exam, fool, funny, gin, granny, hilarious, humor, husband, idiot, jail, jokes, judge, language, laughter, law, lawyer, liquor, man, moron, mother, mother-in-law, office, partner, practice, relationship, rules, rum, scotch, seniors, smiles, spouse, tequila, test, vodka, voice, whiskey, wife, wine, woman, words, youth
. . . Mississippi grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer. . .
.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know me?’ She responded, ‘Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.’
..
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?’ ..
She again replied, ‘Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal
Read More
Jun 21 2011
Posted: under "A Scripture A Day Keeps The Devil Away", "LOVE is LOVELY", "Life is precious handle with PRAYER!".
Tags: actions, attitude, behavior, blessings, bliss, character, child, children, deed, depression, discipline, example, flowers, God, granny, happiness, heart, inspiration, joy, language, life, Lord, love, moment, mother, mother-in-law, parent, patient, practice, prayer, protection, role model, rose, roses, scripture, smiles, stress, truth, understanding, words
“For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath
given me my petition which I asked of him.”
.
– 1 Samuel 1:27
.
As a mom you have so many concerns to bring to God
Character . . . . Discipline . . . . Gentleness . . . .
Obedience . . . . Protection . . . . Patience . . . .
Self-control . . . . Worry . . . .
..
Through prayer, talk with your heavenly Father about those things and more….
Find God’s blessing on all the matters that are on your heart….
Take a moment to enjoy your Father’s loving presence….
the best place a mom can be.
..
My little children,
let us not love in word, neither in tongue;
but in deed and in truth
.
– 1 John 3:18
..
Lord, I’m always telling people how much I love my children, but I’m afraid I’m not always good at putting it into practice. In my heart I know I do love them and want what’s best for them, but I
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May 08 2011
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals.
Tags: appreciation, attention, author, children, direction, earth, family, game, globe, goal, golf, greatness, history, humanity, inspiration, land, life, love, man, music, peace, plane, practice, principles, quotes, school, sport, student, teacher, test, today, tools, universe, woman, world
Johann Sebastian Bach
.
A school music teacher received this essay from an eight-year-old
student concerning Johann Sebastian Bach: “He was a GREAT composer. He
had 20 children and had an old spinster in the attic to practice on.”
.
Actually, I don’t know the exact number of children he had, but it
seems to be quite a few. And I don’t know what he kept in the
attic … or what he practiced on. But the student was absolutely
right
about one thing: Bach was a GREAT composer.
.
Not all of us can be great at what we do. I try to do some things the
very best I can. But that means I cannot give much attention to some
of the less important tasks.
.
But what about just being good at WHO WE ARE? Good human beings? Even
being GREAT at who we are?
.
Author James Michener learned something about greatness on a stormy
night in the South Pacific. His plane was trying desperately to land
on the Tontouta airstrip but could not do so. After several attempts
in the dark of night, his knuckles were white with fear. When they
finally landed safely, Michener went out and walked the length of the
airstrip, looking at the dim outlines of the mountains they had so
narrowly missed. He wrote this:
.
“And as I stood there in the darkness I caught a glimpse of the
remaining years of my life and I swore an oath when peace came, if I
survived, I would live the rest of my years as if I were a great man.
I did not presume to think that I would be a great man. I have never
thought in those terms, but I could conduct myself as if I were. I
would adhere to my basic principles. I would bear public testimony to
what I believed. I would be a better man. I would help others. I would
truly believe and act as if all men were my brothers. And I would
strive to make whatever world in which I found myself a better place.
In the darkness a magnificent peace settled over me, for I saw that I
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