| GOOD SAMARITAN..
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the
Good Samaritan.
She asked the class, “If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all
wounded and
bleeding, what would you do?”
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, “I think I’d throw
up.”
..
DID NOAH FISH?
..
A Sunday school teacher asked, “Johnny, do you think Noah did a
lot of fishing when
he was on the Ark ?” “No,” replied Johnny.
“How could he, with just two worms.”
..
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
..
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most
quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23 .
She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter.
Little Rick was excited about the task - but he just couldn’t remember the Psalm.
After much practice, he could barely get past the first line.
On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation,
Ricky was so nervous.
When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly,
“The Lord is my Shepherd, and that’s all I need to know.”
..
UNANSWERED PRAYER
..
The preacher’s 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always
paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his sermon.
One day, she asked him why. “Well, Honey,” he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages. “I’m asking the Lord to help me preach a
good sermon.”
“How come He doesn’t answer it?” she asked.
..
BEING THANKFUL
..
A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, “So your mother
says your prayers for you each night?
That’s very commendable.
What does she say?”
The little boy replied, “Thank God he’s in bed!”
..
ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS
..
When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal (current and past).
For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli
would say, “and all girls.”
This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing.
My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, “Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?”
Her response, “Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying ‘All Men’!”
..
SAY A PRAYER
..
Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his
Grandmother’s house.
Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served.
When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away.
“Johnny!
Read More
 Dec 06 2011
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny Poetry, Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: anger, art, attitude, behavior, belt, body, butt, car, check, child, children, class, classroom, computer, control, depression, dinner, duty, earrings, education, educator, exam, example, eyes, fashion, food, freedom, funds, funny, God, granny, hairstyle, hands, hilarious, home, House, hug, hugs, humor, influence, internet, job, jokes, kisses, labor, lake, language, laughter, law, learning, lesson, life, lunch, moment, money, moral, mother, mother-in-law, mountain, movie, ocean, online, pants, parent, pastor, phone, pond, pool, prayer, preacher, priest, Professor, reading, recipe, rectum, reverend, rivers, road, role model, rules, school, sea, service, smiles, snack, snacks, stream, stress, style, task, teacher, television, test, today, touch, traffic, travel, treats, tutor, values, vehicle, voice, water, waterfall, waterfalls, words, work
.
Don’t Mess with Mom
====================
.
My son came home from school one day,
with a smirk upon his face.
He’d decided he was smart enough,
to put me in my place.
~*~
“Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that’s taught by Mr. Wright?
It’s all about the laws today,
The “Children’s Bill of Rights.”
~*~
It says I need not clean my room,
don’t have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
or speak, or what to wear.
~*~
I have freedom from religion,
and regardless what you say,
I don’t have to bow my head,
and I sure don’t have to pray.
~*~
I can wear earrings if I want,
and pierce my tongue & nose.
I can read & watch just what I like,
and get tattoos from head to toes.
~*~
And if you ever spank me,
I’ll charge you with the crime.
I’ll back up all my charges,
with the marks on my behind.
~*~
Don’t you ever touch me,
my body’s only for my use,
not for your hugs and kisses,
that’s just more child abuse.
~*~
Don’t preach about your morals,
like your mama did to you.
That’s nothing more than mind control,
Read More
Dec 04 2011
Posted: under Advice & Tips, Inspirationals.
Tags: accomplishment, accomplishments, action, advice, age, anxiety, argument, beauty, belief, blessings, bliss, boss, candle, candles, care, change, children, class, classroom, day, deed, deeds, depression, dream, dreams, dress, duty, elderly, empathy, energy, enthusiasm, era, exercise, faith, family, feeling, feelings, forgiveness, friends, fun, funtime, gratitude, happiness, healing, history, inspiration, job, joy, labor, laughter, leader, learning, lesson, life, lifetime, link, love, man, manager, Mathematics, memory, morning, music, occasion, others, peace, photos, present, purpose, relaxation, rest, school, seniors, short, show, sleep, smiles, stress, supervisor, task, thankfulness, thought, time, tips, today, touch, vampire, video, woman, work
.
CLICK
.
on the link below
.
OR
.
copy & paste into your browser…
.
Read More
Nov 06 2011
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: anger, anxiety, bird, class, classroom, college, depression, designer, difference, duty, emotions, exam, eyes, fashion, fool, funny, genius, humor, idiot, job, jokes, labor, language, laughter, legs, life, man, moment, moron, mountain, others, Professor, school, smiles, stress, student, style, suit, surprise, task, teacher, test, thought, tutor, university, voice, woman, words, work
.
Legs
=====
.
A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his
zoology test the next day. As he entered the classroom, he saw
ten stands with ten pairs of legs on them. Each bird had a sack
over its head; only the legs were showing.
.
He sat in the front row because he wanted to do the best job
possible. The professor announced that the test would be to
look at each of the birds’ legs and give the common name,
habitat, genus and species.
.
The student looked at each of the birds’ legs.
They all looked the same to him.
He began to get upset.
.
He had stayed up all night studying and now had to identify
birds by their legs.
.
The more he thought about it the madder he got.
.
Finally he could stand it no longer.
He went up to the professor’s desk and said,
Read More
May 19 2011
Posted: under Jamaican Jokes.
Tags: bus, child, class, dialect, funny, humor, Jamaica, Jamaican, jokes, language, laughter, patois, school, smiles, teacher, vehicle, vernacular, words
.
A Jamaican teacher asked Leroy to describe the word , “Deceitful”!
Leroy said, ”It’s when there’s no more seats pon de bus!”
May 05 2011
|
