Humor
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: advice, age, aid, Bible, blessings, cemetery, child, children, Christ, church, class, classroom, compassion, computer, contribution, dad, devil, dinner, era, family, father, fish, fishing, food, friends, funny, ghost, girl, God, granny, gratitude, health, hilarious, home, House, humor, internet, Jesus, jokes, laughter, learning, Little Johnny, Lord, man, Mathematics, memory, message, minister, mother, mother-in-law, neighbor, online, parent, pastor, period, practice, prayer, preacher, pride, priest, psalm, rabbi, reading, reverend, satan, school, sermon, sheep, shepherd, sleep, smiles, Sunday, tablecloth, teacher, thankfulness, time, tips, trust, woman, youth
.
| GOOD SAMARITAN..
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan. She asked the class, “If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?” A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, “I think I’d throw up.” .. DID NOAH FISH? .. A Sunday school teacher asked, “Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark ?” “No,” replied Johnny. “How could he, with just two worms.” .. THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD .. A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23 . She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter. Little Rick was excited about the task - but he just couldn’t remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Ricky was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, “The Lord is my Shepherd, and that’s all I need to know.” .. UNANSWERED PRAYER .. The preacher’s 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his sermon. One day, she asked him why. “Well, Honey,” he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages. “I’m asking the Lord to help me preach a good sermon.” “How come He doesn’t answer it?” she asked. .. BEING THANKFUL .. A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, “So your mother says your prayers for you each night? That’s very commendable. What does she say?” The little boy replied, “Thank God he’s in bed!” .. ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS .. When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal (current and past). For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, “and all girls.” This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing. My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, “Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?” Her response, “Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying ‘All Men’!” .. SAY A PRAYER .. Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his Grandmother’s house. Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away. “Johnny!
The gym experiencePosted: under "A Slice Of Life", Funny and Hilarious Jokes, Nasty and Rude Jokes.
. A WOMAN’S WEEK AT THE GYM . . . . . . . . . . .
The Homeless ManPosted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals.
. The Homeless Man . It was a cold winter’s day that Sunday. The parking lot to the church was filling up quickly. I noticed as I got out of my car that fellow church members were whispering among themselves as they walked to the church. As I got closer I saw a man leaned up against the wall outside the church. He was almost laying down as if he was asleep. He had on a long trench coat that was almost in shreds and a hat topped his head, pulled down so you could not see his face. . He wore shoes that looked 30 years old, too small for his feet with holes all over them, his toes stuck out. I assumed this man was homeless, and asleep, so I walked on by through the doors of the church. We all fellowshiped for a few minutes, and someone brought up the man laying outside. People snickered and gossiped but no one bothered to ask him to come in, including me. . A few moments later church began. We all waited for the Preacher to take his place and to give us Read More
Little John the BaptistPosted: under Short Funny Jokes.
. Johnny’s Mother looked out the window and noticed him “playing church” with their cat. . He had the cat sitting quietly and he was preaching to it. . She smiled and went about her work. . A while later she heard loud meowing and hissing and ran back to the open window to see Johnny baptizing the
YOU TOOK MY SPACEPosted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals. . One day, a man went to visit a church, He got there early, parked his car and got out. Another car pulled up near the driver got out and said, ” I always park there! .. You took my place!” ..
.. The visitor was somewhat distressed by this rude welcome, but said nothing. ..
Big Boy StoriesPosted: under Jamaican Jokes. |
Dec 06 2011
