Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: aroma, boobs, bra, breasts, companion, couple, fart, fragrance, funny, hilarious, home, House, humor, husband, idea, jokes, laughter, man, mirror, money, odor, pants, partner, perfume, scent, sex, smiles, spouse, time, widow, wife, woman
He said to me .. . . I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.
I said to him . . . You wear pants don’t you? He said to me . . ….. Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . That’s a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart! He said to me. … What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him . …Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
Posted: under "A Slice Of Life", Inspirationals.
Tags: age, aid, army, art, artist, beacon, bliss, candle, care, caring, cemetery, cheer, child, Christ, christmas, classic, cold, country, dad, doctor, dream, dreams, duty, earth, elderly, emotion, era, eyes, family, father, fire, flame, friends, friendship, genius, ghost, gift, global, globe, God, gratitude, hand, hands, happiness, health, heart, history, holiday, honor, hospital, ice, inspiration, Jesus, job, joy, King, labor, land, letter, life, lifestyle, lifetime, light, listening, Lord, love, mail, man, medical, medication, medicine, military, mind, moment, money, nation, neighbor, neighborhood, obituary, others, painting, path, period, perspective, photos, physician, preparation, present, pride, promise, satisfaction, Savior, scripture, season, seniors, service, show, sign, snow, soldier, son, sound, specialist, spring, sunshine, surgeon, surprise, task, thankfulness, time, touch, treasure, truth, universe, value, voice, war, wealth, widow, winter, woman, work, world, worth
Once there was a father and son who were very close and enjoyed adding valuable art pieces to their collection. Priceless works by Picasso, Van Gogh, Monet and many others adorned the walls of the family estate.
..
The widowed, elder man looked on with satisfaction as his only child became an experienced art collector. The son’s trained eye and sharp business mind caused his father to beam with pride as they dealt with art collectors around the world.
Posted: under Dumb Blonde Jokes.
Tags: belt, blonde, cemetery, check, color, colors, couple, doctor, duppy, duty, fashion, fool, funds, funny, ghost, humor, husband, idiot, job, jokes, labor, laughter, man, money, moron, pants, smiles, spouse, stupid, style, suit, task, widow, wife, woman, work
A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit. The female blonde mortician asks the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the black suit he is already wearing.
The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the blonde mortician a blank check and says, ‘I don’t care what it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.’
The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight, she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe; the suit fits him perfectly.
She says to the mortician, ‘Whatever this cost, I’m very satisfied. You did an excellent job and I’m very grateful. How much did you spend?’ To her astonishment, the blonde mortician presents her with the blank check. ‘There’s no charge,’ she says. ‘No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit!’ she says.
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Oct 02 2008
Posted: under Short Funny Jokes.
Tags: age, companion, couple, elderly, funny, home, House, humor, husband, jokes, language, laughter, New York, partner, seniors, short, smiles, snow, spouse, time, widow, wife, winter, words
We purchased an old home in northern New York State
from an elderly widow.
Winter was fast approaching and I was concerned about
the house’s lack of insulation. “If they could live here all
those years, so can we,” my husband confidently declared.
One November night, the temperature plunged to below
zero and we woke up to find our interior walls covered
with frost. My husband called the old lady to ask how
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Aug 16 2008
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: age, child, community, companion, couple, courage, delight, dinner, elderly, family, food, funny, heart, hilarious, home, House, humor, husband, jokes, language, laughter, marriage, meal, memory, morning, parent, partner, phone, proposal, seniors, smiles, spouse, strength, time, wedding, widow, widower, wife, words
There were these two elderly people living in a Florida old age home.
He was a widower and she a widow. They had known one another for
a number of years.
Now, one evening, there was a community supper in the big activity center.
These two were at the same table, across from one another. As the meal
went on, he made a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered up
his courage to ask her, “Will you marry me?” Read More
Jul 30 2008
Posted: under Funny and Hilarious Jokes.
Tags: car, cemetery, check, child, companion, computer, couple, dad, eyes, father, flight, friends, funeral, funny, ghost, hilarious, home, hotel, House, humor, husband, internet, jokes, journey, language, laughter, letter, love, mail, mother, obituary, online, parents, path, perception, plane, reading, road, smiles, son, spouse, surprise, traffic, vehicle, widow, wife, words
A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally typed the wrong e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.
Meanwhile… somewhere, a widow had just returned home from her husband’s funeral. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
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Jul 29 2008